OFFICIAL DOCUMENT

FORM 404: APOLOGY NOT FOUND (But I'm Trying Anyway)

REF: SORRY-2024-OMG PRIORITY: CRITICAL

I acknowledge that I messed up

I have spent 47 hours overthinking this

My friends are tired of hearing about it

I've practiced this apology in the mirror

I may have stress-eated 3 bags of chips

THE APOLOGY

Look, I know I messed up. Like, historically messed up. If there was a Hall of Fame for messing up, I'd be in it. First ballot. They'd retire my jersey.

I've been staring at my phone for 3 days trying to figure out what to say. My thumbs have never been so sweaty.

So here it is: I'm sorry. I'm genuinely, truly, profoundly sorry. And I made you this website because apparently I think I'm a web developer now.

🎁 BRIBE OPTIONS (Choose Wisely)

☕ Coffee Your favorite, on me

🍕 Food I'll buy, you choose

😂 Memes 1 week of daily memes

🧹 Chores Your chores for a month

FORGIVENESS PROBABILITY

Still Mad Maybe? Forgiven!

Calculating...

YOUR VERDICT

(No pressure, but my entire emotional wellbeing depends on this)